“Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.”
— Ray Romano
If you’re a college student, chances are you’ve been to a nightclub. Perhaps you were clubbing in Vegas a few months, or days even, before the strip turned pink. It’s easy to imagine: uncomfortable shoes, a small bead of sweat trickling down the back of your neck, and a drunk girl shoving her way to the front of the DJ set at an ungodly hour of the night.
Every clubber has complained about being tired, about the noise and about being damp from the $30 vodka-cranberry dumped on them by a passerby. Few of them, probably, have stopped to consider that they could be experiencing these same complaints in a different capacity a mere 9 months later.
Yet, if you’re pregnant or recently had a baby, then it’s likely that you will be whining about how your baby is making too much noise; about how your baby is dowsing you in very expensive milk, and about how your baby will not (for the love of GOD) let you go to sleep.
In reality, a night club and a baby are two very different experiences. Nonetheless, in a sleep-deprived haze, it’s difficult not to draw a parallel between the two. In both instances, as a student, you may also have to fight a sleepless hangover the next morning, while you labor through a long essay or complete an overdue college assignment.
Being a full-time college student and a full-time mom isn’t impossible. It does, however, require some compromise and some planning. In many ways, parenting while studying is similar to studying while maintaining the life of a serial partyer. To survive, you need to: hydrate, nap in your downtime, eat healthy and take a break every now and then.
Regardless of how well you prepare: it won’t be easy. You may already know that. That’s perhaps the only thing that anyone ever tells you about parenting, that it’s hard. And that it “goes so by fast” (brace yourself for a lot of people telling you that like it’s the most novel and most profound thing they’ve ever said).
Nonetheless, a little prep during your pregnancy goes a long way in helping you finish your degree with a screaming child at your hip. Here are a few ways to make life a little less complicated:
- Prepare for Compromise
You may have to trade the “college experience” for an online degree, or transfer to a different program that gives you the flexibility to set your own hours. If this isn’t possible, then you may have to take time off before returning to class.
- You don’t need a village, but find a little support.
If you don’t have the elusive “village” that everyone refers to when discussing child rearing, then that’s okay. Plenty of people do it alone. However, as a student, you should secure yourself someone who will commit to watching your baby during finals week or when a pressing assignment needs to get done.
- Be upfront with your professors.
In an ideal world, you would plan to have your unplanned baby during your summer break. This, however, defies the notion of an unplanned pregnancy. Therefore, you should ask your professor if you can work ahead in the months leading up to the birth.
- Stock Up Resources
Sadly, your cram fuel is likely a thing of the past. Hot Cheetos and Starbucks will not be compatible with breastfeeding. Likewise, running out to Chipotle for a quick bite will become a terribly cumbersome task as soon as car seats are involved. If possible, in order to fuel your study sessions, try to meal prep and freeze food ahead of your due date. You could also bulk buy frozen meals at Costco, alongside diapers and wipes; or try a meal delivery service for the first few months.
- Enjoy your Freedom
College can be thrilling, but it can also be an alienating, confusing time. Having a baby can be a similarly terrifying experience at times, but it can also be the most rewarding and motivating experience of your life. You should try to enjoy your time as a childless student while you can, but it’s okay to be excited about your baby while you do. They’re pretty cool.
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