Pregnancy – Bottle Service

A Look on the Bright Side: A Few Benefits to Having a Baby While in College

Me on Instagram: Made cupcakes w the kids, love them so much. Me for real: YOU’RE GETTING EGGSHELLS IN THE BATTER JESUS CHRIST LET ME DO IT
Vampire Valerie

**PSA: THIS IS BY NO MEANS ENCOURAGING COLLEGE STUDENTS TO GET PREGNANT. THIS IS JUST AN ATTEMPT AT OPTIMISM FOR THOSE THAT HAPPEN TO BE IN THIS SITUATION.

So you’re in college and you’re having a baby.

Bottle service, VIP booths, sweaty dancing, nights drinking Monster in the library–they’re all gone. It’s now evenings at home, watching TV really quietly, and enjoying your child-free hour before bed.

Having a kid while you’re of traditional college age, or in college at any age, isn’t ideal. You have other commitments and responsibilities, and the general consensus is that you should probably wait to reproduce until after graduation.

But if this isn’t your reality, and you’ve come to terms with your decision to have a kid, then congrats! Here are some perks to having a child while in college:

It May Benefit Your Career

Providing you graduate from college despite your bundle of joy, you can kick start your career with the whole “having a kid” thing out of the way.

Many college graduates land their dream job at age 26/27, and then quit or take significant time off said job only a few years later, when maternity and paternity leave takes precedence to their work.

If you’ve already taken your leave before you even start your career, then it definitely won’t get in the way. And, sure, you’ll have to leave early or avoid working late to accommodate your child’s schedule–but your boss will know this before they hire you and you won’t have to pause your career in the near future.

If You’re of Traditional College Age: You’ll Have More Energy and Be a Younger Empty Nester

If you’re having a baby at 21/22/23/24 years of age, then you’ll have more energy than you will in your 30s. This is by no means a reason to have a child this young, but it’s definitely a perk if you so happen to be in this situation.

Toddlers are exhausting. They run everywhere and they keep you up all night. So if dancing and cramming your days away is second nature already, then this may benefit you.

Likewise, if you have a baby at 22, then by 40, you will be an empty-nester. This means you will be young and active enough to enjoy life after your children leave home. You will have another lifetime to enjoy your grandchildren, and (maybe, hopefully) early retirement.

It May Motivate You

This is a highly subjective benefit, but a potential perk nonetheless.

For some college students, wondering aimlessly through their general ed with no purpose and no direction, having a kid may be motivating.

When you have a new human to pay for, paying for random college credits may no longer seems as enticing. You have to knuckle down, do well, and graduate as fast as possible. This may be the incentive you need.

A Few Perks and a LOT Of Challenges

Swapping out formula bottle service for champagne on ice (this is a thing now?) is not easy. You should take whatever precautions you can to avoid that.

But if you’ve made a decision, and you’re met with constant negativity, there is no shame in looking on the bright side. For what it’s worth, champagne on the rocks is not good. Not at all. So you’re not missing out on much.

When Gaining a Baby Means Losing a Friend

Parenthood is the scariest hood you will ever go through
Anonymous

Sometimes, having a baby means losing a friend.

The harsh reality is that not everyone loves, or even likes, kids. And when you become a parent, your baby becomes your entire life, so it’s difficult to reconcile your new universe with a friend who wants no part of it.

If you’re in college, you may lose more than one friend. You may find yourself at odds with your entire friendship group. If you can’t party, you can’t drink, you can’t even relate to the relationship drama or meaningless conversations about a “future” you’re no longer working towards–then you may get left out.

It’s annoying; but it’s a new reality. You may no longer have as much in common with your friends as you once did, and no matter how many times you watch their Instagram stories and stew with jealousy, this won’t change.

The great thing about becoming a parent, however, is that you can relate to a whole group of people.

And there’s no better way to make friends than to have your kid do it for you. Play groups, story-times, events at daycare, random outings to the park. There are so many opportunities for you to meet moms and dads who you click with, and can relate to, for the rest of your life.

If your friends stick by you, then this is a testament to your friendship and the strength of your relationship. But if you just had a baby, and your friends are MIA, know that you’re not alone. As soon as your kid can play nice, he’ll start matchmaking for you.

FIY there are also “dating apps” designed to link up parents, like Peanut!

How to Prep for The Least Fun and Most Rewarding Night Club Ever

“Having children is like living in a frat house – nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up.”
— Ray Romano

If you’re a college student, chances are you’ve been to a nightclub. Perhaps you were clubbing in Vegas a few months, or days even, before the strip turned pink. It’s easy to imagine: uncomfortable shoes, a small bead of sweat trickling down the back of your neck, and a drunk girl shoving her way to the front of the DJ set at an ungodly hour of the night.

Every clubber has complained about being tired, about the noise and about being damp from the $30 vodka-cranberry dumped on them by a passerby. Few of them, probably, have stopped to consider that they could be experiencing these same complaints in a different capacity a mere 9 months later.

Yet, if you’re pregnant or recently had a baby, then it’s likely that you will be whining about how your baby is making too much noise; about how your baby is dowsing you in very expensive milk, and about how your baby will not (for the love of GOD) let you go to sleep.

In reality, a night club and a baby are two very different experiences. Nonetheless, in a sleep-deprived haze, it’s difficult not to draw a parallel between the two. In both instances, as a student, you may also have to fight a sleepless hangover the next morning, while you labor through a long essay or complete an overdue college assignment.

Being a full-time college student and a full-time mom isn’t impossible. It does, however, require some compromise and some planning. In many ways, parenting while studying is similar to studying while maintaining the life of a serial partyer. To survive, you need to: hydrate, nap in your downtime, eat healthy and take a break every now and then.

Regardless of how well you prepare: it won’t be easy. You may already know that. That’s perhaps the only thing that anyone ever tells you about parenting, that it’s hard. And that it “goes so by fast” (brace yourself for a lot of people telling you that like it’s the most novel and most profound thing they’ve ever said).

Nonetheless, a little prep during your pregnancy goes a long way in helping you finish your degree with a screaming child at your hip. Here are a few ways to make life a little less complicated:

Prepare for Compromise

You may have to trade the “college experience” for an online degree, or transfer to a different program that gives you the flexibility to set your own hours. If this isn’t possible, then you may have to take time off before returning to class.
You don’t need a village, but find a little support.

If you don’t have the elusive “village” that everyone refers to when discussing child rearing, then that’s okay. Plenty of people do it alone. However, as a student, you should secure yourself someone who will commit to watching your baby during finals week or when a pressing assignment needs to get done.
Be upfront with your professors.

In an ideal world, you would plan to have your unplanned baby during your summer break. This, however, defies the notion of an unplanned pregnancy. Therefore, you should ask your professor if you can work ahead in the months leading up to the birth.
Stock Up Resources

Sadly, your cram fuel is likely a thing of the past. Hot Cheetos and Starbucks will not be compatible with breastfeeding. Likewise, running out to Chipotle for a quick bite will become a terribly cumbersome task as soon as car seats are involved. If possible, in order to fuel your study sessions, try to meal prep and freeze food ahead of your due date. You could also bulk buy frozen meals at Costco, alongside diapers and wipes; or try a meal delivery service for the first few months.
Enjoy your Freedom

College can be thrilling, but it can also be an alienating, confusing time. Having a baby can be a similarly terrifying experience at times, but it can also be the most rewarding and motivating experience of your life. You should try to enjoy your time as a childless student while you can, but it’s okay to be excited about your baby while you do. They’re pretty cool.